The Subject
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I try never to be surprised
But somehow I always seem to surprise other people
It makes me laugh
It means they're expecting something
I used to be the party girl
With a smile in a constant stricture of hysterical pain
Hips cracked
Legs rusted open
Dizzy from watching my bra spin on one too many ceiling fans
After a dozen years I have reached the sublime point
Where everything I do is out of character one way or the other
I didn't even know I had a character
What kind of clown am I?
The crying on the inside kind, I guess
What's wrong with me?
None of your goddamn business
Nothing Really
Well not much
When it's all stripped down
I'm nothing but an overthought flatworm
I move away from the parts of the tank where I get the painful shock
And live to split another day
Or line up side by side with another of my kind and share everything I've got
Everything I am
Everything I've learned
Syzygy it's called
Fact is I can't live up to my own legend
It doesn't particularly interest me anymore
I'm just a rat who's gotten good at working the feeder bar
And staying off the hot spots on the maze
Receive the stimulus
Figure out the least painful response
Stimulus
Response
Stimulus
Response
Try to build a nest for my young outta that crappy newspaper in the bottom of the cage
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